This Toilet Tuesday (2/24/15)

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It’s your second day in Japan. You and a close friend had been saving for months for this trip and you’re finally ready to start taking in the sights. One of the first places you stopped was a small restaurant; you knew that it would take time for your digestive tract to acclimate to a new diet, but that didn’t stop you from binging on sushi and okonomiyaki. Now, here on a crowded street in downtown Hiroshima, you are beginning to feel the karmic backlash for your culinary recklessness. You dash through the crowd into the nearest shop (a dingy hardware store) and shout at the cashier in broken Japanese for a toilet. Looking slightly confused, he points you to an unmarked door in the back. Clenching your buttocks in an effort to hold back the coming tide, you waddle over and push open the door. To your dismay, there is no actual toilet; just a small hole in the floor opens into a pit. Not even a proper squatting toilet. However, you have no choice. You groan and squat over the hole.

Just as you’re about to do the deed, you see the door start to open. “Wait!” you shout, and you try to push the door closed with your foot. You miss and lose your balance. You topple sideways and start to fall headfirst into the pit, but you catch yourself with one hand and feel the restroom intruder grab onto your outstretched leg. Unfortunately, the strain proves to be too much for your bowels, and they finally unleash their fury into the face of your would-be rescuer. Unable maintain his grip in the wake of your shit fountain, he lets go and you plummet into a fetid pool of human waste.

It is in this moment that you realize that there is a god and that he hates you. This is Toilet Tuesday.


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A Forest of Stars – Beware the Sword You Cannot See (Lupus Lounge/Prophecy) [Progressive Black Metal]
Listen to “Virtus Sola Invicta”

The violin-packing, semi-psychedelic black metallers return to bring some eccentric and slightly proggy adventure metal for your ears. A thick atmosphere, dem hevy feels, and a dash of melody await you. (Karhu)


TAU_CD_cover

Negură Bunget – Tău (Prophecy) [Black Metal]
Listen to “Schimniceste”

“The beginning of the ambitious Transylvanian trilogy”

Some harsh black metal and folky interludes that harken back to the days of “Om” rather than Negură Bunget’s newer releases. Perhaps the most atmospheric this band has been so far. (Karhu)


Carach-Angren-This-Is-No-Fairytale

Carach Angren – This is No Fairy Tale (Season of Mist) [Black Metal]
Stream

Recently I saw someone in the comments claim that they miss music that tells a story. Well, look no further than Carach Angren’s newest This Is No Fairytale. The always goofy, always awesome CA have returned to drop another cinematic narrative experience, this time tackling the nightmarish world of Brothers Grimm-esque children’s stories. But don’t for a minute think that this band is just a joke. The riffs and drums are still razor sharp and brutal. The band just happens to find inspiration in much more interesting themes than the subject matter used by most black metal acts. I, for one, appreciate the entertaining stories, and I’m sure you will too. Stream the whole album courtesy of Decibel. FFO: Dimmu Borgir, Septicflesh, Keep of Kalessin (W.)


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Pelican – The Cliff (Southern Lord) [Grunge]
Listen to “The Cliff”

I’ve been a fan of sludgy instrumental act Pelican for some time now, so I was actually pretty intrigued that this EP features multiple versions of one song. Even more interesting though is the fact that at least one version of “The Cliff” features vocals by Allen Epley. The song works great with lyrics, and I’m stoked to hear that Justin Broadrick remix. You can jam two of the four tracks over at Bandcamp.. FFO: Russian Circles, Godflesh, Isis (W.)


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Melechesh – Enki (Nuclear Blast) [Black Metal]
Stream

Melechesh is a band that I recently discovered when they started streaming the new album. I was hooked from the second I hit play. I now have the majority of their discography and cannot wait to add Enki to the collection. Melechesh play black/death metal with a touch of thrash and some technicality thrown in for good measure. This shit fucking rips and you should buy it because Jack Bauer said so! (<———)


Acherontas – Ma-ion (Formulas of Reptilian Unification) (WTC Productions) [Black Metal]
Preview

The Agonist – Eye of Providence (Century Media) [Metalcore]
Stream

All That Remains – The Order of Things (Razor & Tie) [Metalcore]
Listen to “No Knock”

Ambivalence – A Land of Myth & Magic (Endless Desperation) [Doom/Death]

An Autumn for Crippled Children – The Long Goodbye (Wicker Man) [Post-Black Metal]
Listen

Ancestrum – Our Heathen Soil (Misanthropic Spirit) [Folk/Black Metal]
Listen to “Spirits of Unreal”

Aseethe – Nothing Left, Nothing Gained (Bellowing Mass) [Drone/Doom]
Stream

Axolotl – Voices of Luna (Bret Hard Records) [Melodeath]
Listen to “Prosekturian Dawn”

Bio-Cancer – Tormenting the Innocent (Candlelight Records) [Death/Thrash]
Listen to “Bulletproof,” “Obligated to Incest”

Bleeding Gods -Shepherd of Souls (Punishment 18) [Death Metal]
Listen to “Shepherd of Souls”

Code – Mut (Agonia Records) [Post-Metal]
Listen to “Affliction,” “Dialogue”

Codex – The Peace Paradox (Independent) [Power Prog]
Stream

Crest of Darkness – Evil Messiah (My Kingdom Music) [Black Metal]
Listen to “Sick Things”

Crimson Wind – Last Poetry Line (Pitch Black Records) [Power Metal]
Listen to “In Vain”

Crypt Sermon – Out of the Garden (Dark Descent) [Doom]
Listen

Damnation Defaced – The Infernal Tremor (Kernkraftritter Records) [Death Metal]
Preview

Decline of the I – Rebellion (Agonia Records) [Black/Doom]]
Listen to “Lower Degree of God’s Might,” “Hexenface”

Devathorn – Vritra (WTC Productions) [Black Metal]
Preview

Dr. Living Dead! – Crush the Sublime Gods (Century Media) [Thrash]
Listen to “Civilized to Death”

Elder – Lore (Stickman/Armageddon Shop) [Doom]
Listen to “Compendium”

Embrional – The Devil Inside (Old Temple) [Blackened Death]
Listen to “Funeral March,” “In Darkness”

Endlesshade – Wolf Will Swallow the Sun (Naturmacht Productions/Rain Without End) [Funeral Doom]
Stream

Enforcer – From Beyond (Nuclear Blast) [Heavy Metal]
Listen to “Undying Evil”

Enthrone the Unborn – LXXVIII (57 Records) [Melodeath]
Stream

Evil Invaders – Pulses of Pleasure (Napalm Records) [Thrash]
Listen to “Fast, Loud ‘n’ Rude”

Fashion Week – Prêt-à-Porter (Solar Flare Records) [Sludge/Noise]
Stream

Frosttide – Blood Oath (Noise Art Records) [Epic Melodeath]
Listen to “Fate Redefined”

Furyon – Lost Salvation (Dream Records) [Heavy Metal/Hard Rock]
Listen to “These Four Walls”

Glaciation – Sur les Falaises de Marbre (Osmose Productions) [Black Metal]
Listen to “Le Soleil et l’Acier”

Goat Semen – Ego Svm Satana (Hell’s Headbangers) [Black Metal]
Listen to “Ego Svm Satana”

Godless Angel – Harvester of Shadows (Inverse Records) [lolbuttz]
Listen to “Beneath the Skin”

Graveyard After Graveyard – Hellhound on my Trail (Chaos Records) [Black Thrash]
Listen to “Out to Feed”

Gyze – Black Bride (Coroner Records) [Melodeath]

Hacavitz – Darkness Beyond (Dark Descent) [Black Metal]
Stream

Helrunar – Niederkunfft (Lupus Lounge) [Black Metal]
Listen to “Devils, Devils Everywhere,” “Magdeburg Brennt”

Horrendous Rebirth – Devouring Chaos (Independent) [Slam & Cheese]
Listen to “Extinction”

In Other Climes – Leftover (Bastardized Recordings) [Hardcore]
Listen to “Leftover”

Izah – Sistere (Nordvind) [Sludge]
Stream

Johannson & Speckmann (Vic Records) [Death Metal]
Listen to “Mask of the Treacherous”

Krysantemia – Finis Dierum (Memorial Records) [Death Metal]
Stream

Maggot Colony – Spewing the Violated Souls (Rising Nemesis) [Slamwise Gamgee]
Listen to “Regurgitated Sins on Men”

Malphas – The Conjuring (Independent) [Black Metal]
Listen to “Legions”

Manifest – …And for This we Should be Damned? (ViciSolum) [Death Metal]
Listen to “Violently Engaged,” “Burning Brimstones”

Monox – Perception Changes (Metal Sound) [Death Metal]
Preview

Monsterworks – The Existential Codex (Eat Lead & Die) [Prog Metal]
Listen to “Tapping the Void”

Nachtschatten – Prolog (Sonic Revolution) [Melodeath]
Listen

Nomadic Rituals/Tome – Nomadic Rituals/Tome (split- Independent) [Doom/Sludge]

Opium Lord – The Calendrical Cycle: Eye of Earth (Candlelight Records) [Doom/Sludge]
Listen to “Challenger”

Pandemia – At the Gates of Nihilism (Mighty Music/Target Group) [Death Metal]
Listen to “Rotting in Mold”

Profet – Torture of Flesh (Marburg Records) [Thrash]
Listen to “Nations Fall”

Prowler – Stallions of Steel (Pure Steel Records) [Heavy Metal]

Reign of Fury – Death Be thy Shepherd (Independent) [Thrash]
Listen to “Gates of Sanity”

The Resistance – Torture Tactics (earMusic) [Death Metal]
Listen to “For War”

Ruby the Hatchet – Valley of the Snake (Tee Pee Records) [Doom]
Listen to “Heavy Blanket”

Saturnalia Temple – To the Other (Ajna Offensive) [Doom]
Listen to “To the Other”

Scorpions – Return to Forever (Sony Music/New Door) [Heavy Metal]
Listen to “We Built This House”

Seven Year Storm – Aion I (Hammerdown Records) [Prog Metal]
Listen to “Dyatlov”

Sewercide – Severing the Mortal Cord (Infernal Devastation) [Death Metal]
Listen to “Shackled by Ignorance,” “Rituals of Ceremonial Sickness”

Six of Swords – Polar Vortex (Sorrow Carrier) [Death Metal]
Listen to “Separation at the Seams”

Stoned Jesus – The Harvest (Independent) [Doom]
Listen to “Here Come the Robots”

The Storyteller – Sacred Fire (Dark Legacy) [Heavy/Power Metal]
Listen to “One Last Stand”

Swarþ – Veneficivm (Iron Bonehead) [Black Metal]
Listen to “I”

Terror Empire – The Empire Strikes Back (Nordavind Records) [Thrash]
Stream

Torche – Restarter (Relapse Records) [Sludge] Review
Listen

Trauma – Rapture and Wrath (Pure Steel Records) [Heavy Metal]
Listen to “When I Die”

Trident – Shadows (War Anthem) [Blackened Death]
Preview

Vassafor/Temple Nightside – Call of the Maelstrom (split- Iron Bonehead) [Black Metal]
Stream (Temple Nightside)

Wolfpakk – Rise of the Animal (AFM Records) [Heavy Metal]
Listen to “Sock It To Me”

Yzordderrex – Cathedral (Independent) [Doom]
Stream

Zørormr – Corpus Hermeticum (Via Nocturna) [Black Metal]
Listen to “I Am Legend”

Did we forget a new release? Is there a way we could improve this list? Let us know in the comments below!

(Photos VIA, VIAVIA, VIA, and VIA)

 

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