My fellow Toileteers, Great Sitters on the Porcelain Throne, esteemed ladies and gentlemen of The Bowl, I apologize to all of you for everything you will read below and in the future. The words, the length, the style, the music, all of it, is utter garbage. The task became greater than my meager talents and patience could bear. Ambition and pride took hold and, like a fool, I allowed it. If you know what’s good for you, you’ll smash that back button and get out of here. With that said, welcome to my adventure through the Pirate Metal Archipelago: On … Continue reading Porkins’ Pirate Adventure: Half-Mast