{"id":23352,"date":"2015-03-27T15:00:50","date_gmt":"2015-03-27T20:00:50","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.toiletovhell.com\/?p=23352"},"modified":"2015-03-27T12:53:49","modified_gmt":"2015-03-27T17:53:49","slug":"flush-it-friday-special-guest-edition","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/toiletovhell.com\/flush-it-friday-special-guest-edition\/","title":{"rendered":"Flush It Friday: Special Guest Edition"},"content":{"rendered":"
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Hai!<\/p>\n

After killing Reposted A7x Fan for making my fanbase<\/a> look even stupider than it already is, I needed to explore new horizons to embellish my\u00a0already fucking illustrious career<\/a>! So here I am writing this Flush It Friday thingy! I like Fridays a lot. It means the week is almost over and I\u00a0won’t have to steal any more riffs until next week. Also, I can play my Call of Doody games and 360 no-scope some Rings of Saturn fans. What if I\u00a0told you I was actually really super kvlt<\/a> and I just like money so I staty in Avenged Sevenfold? Lol “staty”. Look at that typo, it’s like “Stacey”,\u00a0but not really. Do you like going off on tangents? I like to – did you guys play my new game yet? I mean our new game, of course. It sucks! You\u00a0should totally buy it though because it’s quite good at repelling loofahs. I don’t like loofahs, THEY ALWAYS TRY TO CLEAN ME! FUCK OUT OF HERE WITH THAT SHIT I JUST WANT TO WRESTLE IN THE MUD WITH SYN! STAY SHADOWS!<\/p>\n

Good:<\/strong> When I went to the bathroom this morning it was the greatest-feeling poop I have ever had. Like, when it came out, I was in pure ecstasy. My\u00a0body was so happy to be rid of the festering monster of a turd! Note to self: work festering monster turd into the next album somehow, probably\u00a0with the FFDP riff we stole.<\/p>\n

Bad:<\/strong> I don’t like the cold. It makes my fingers all stiff and stuff. It should not be cold anymore, it should be hot so I can look at all the\u00a0cute girlies in their miniskirts<\/a>. It’s much easier to hunt evil loofahs<\/a> in the warm weather too. Bitches be hiding in the snow when it’s cold out.\u00a0Then they pop out like a snowcanic eruption and are like, “Time to get clean, mofo!”<\/p>\n

Ugly:<\/strong> Avenged Sevenfold hasn’t been creative since City of Evil, but other bands are always staying creative and I wish I could do that too but at\u00a0the same time I am making some good money so I am conflicted between being a total sellout and making the music I want to make one day I hope to\u00a0be like Metallica and be able to take a century to release a new album and also that way I wont have to have a side career of loofah-hunting because I will probably have enough money to learn what a run on sentence i-OHMYGOD THE ICE CREAM TRUCK!<\/p>\n

It’s Friday! Flush your life and pretend there is something good about it!<\/p>\n

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[Editor’s Note: We apologize for the inanity of the above message. Here’s an animal gif to compensate you for lost time.]<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n

http:\/\/i.imgur.com\/JXqKvRF.gifv<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Hai!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":60,"featured_media":23358,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"inline_featured_image":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[36],"tags":[3291],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/toiletovhell.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/03\/M-Shadowsssss.jpg?fit=700%2C500&ssl=1","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/toiletovhell.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/23352"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/toiletovhell.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/toiletovhell.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/toiletovhell.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/60"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/toiletovhell.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=23352"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/toiletovhell.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/23352\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/toiletovhell.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/23358"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/toiletovhell.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=23352"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/toiletovhell.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=23352"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/toiletovhell.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=23352"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}