Pew Pew Pew! It’s Video Game Grind from Futuristic Death Tank
Your soundtrack to defeating flashing red monsters.
Do any of the following items interest you: Final Fantasy VII, Agoraphobic Nosebleed, Mega Man, Krallice, colorful Lucasarts games, or Big Black? Cool, now that everyone on Earth is piqued, let’s talk about The Last Boss.
A lot of great music has been hitting the Toilet ov Hell inbox lately. I’m going to share all of that shit with you, but most pressing for your Wednesday morning is this 10-minute demo of retro video game-inspired cybergrind from Futuristic Death Tank. This Minnesconsin-affiliated duo specializes in quick bursts of chaotic grind, punk, and noise rock with a surprising panache for memorable melodic lines and hilariously accurate lyrics.
There are no song titles for this demo, so I’ve instead listed the game that inspires each song:
0:00 – Chrono Trigger
1:03 – Super Mario World
1:32 – Final Fantasy VI
1:58 – The Secret of Monkey Island
3:21 – Mike Tyson’s Punch Out!
3:52 – Mega Man X
4:28 – Day of the Tentacle
5:33 – StarFox 64
6:39 – Final Fantasy VII
The Last Boss is all about, uh, the last boss in a bunch of classic video games. The music here is appropriately urgent and apocalyptic. Every ounce of drama from these 9 different video games permeates throughout the demo. Standout tracks here include the sinister opener “Chromo Trigger”, punk-as-fuck “Mike Tyson’s Punch Out!”, and the appropriately epic “Final Fantasy VII”.
I would be a fool to not include some of the lyrical gems on display here. “Super Mario World” takes me back to the feeling of being an child in front of the Nintendo pre-Internet.
SMILING ON MY TELEVISION
BACK UP AT YOU
MY FRIEND’S OLDER BROTHER SHOWED ME HOW
THROW EM UP YOU LIL RED FUCK
“Mega Man X” not only accurately describes the storyline, but gives some much-needed personality to the Blue Bomber:
IN THE PAST 54 MINUTES
I HAVE BEATEN UP 8 EXOTICALLY-DRESSED MEN
EACH WITH THEIR OWN DISTINCT SMELLS AND APPENDAGES
AND I HAVE ACQUIRED THE FINEST ACCESSORIES IN ALL OF MEGA-LAND
AND THEY ADORN MY SUPPLE, NUBILE SPACE SUIT
SIGMA’S IN FOR A TREAT, HE’S IN FOR A TREAT
AND THEN HE WAS EASY AS FUCK
“Final Fantasy VI” sums up my feelings for literally every video game I ever enjoyed as a child:
MAYBE NEXT TIME STEAD OF PLAYIN I’LL JUST WATCH THE SPEED RUN
PINNACLE OF GAMING
DON’T REMEMBER PLAYING IT
These fellas are on the next level. Go like Futuristic Death Tank on Facebook and tell ’em “Bleep bloop boop”.