Michigan Metal Fest 2025
“Somebody peel that fucking banana!”
My wet and wild time at Michigan Metal Fest 2025
An official MMF Press Pass and it’s mine, all mine.
It’s Michigan Metal Fest 2025 and guess who has a press pass? Me. It’s me.
Day 1
When I arrive at the lovely Leila Arboretum on Friday, Aug. 22 for what is being called the Pregame, the show has already begun. There are only 5 bands in the lineup, compared to Saturday’s 20 or so. This is the first year that Michigan Metal Fest is a two-day festival, so I don’t know what to expect, but there are very few cars in the parking lot.
As I walk from my car I see a bumper sticker that says, “Horn if you’re honkey,” which makes me laugh. I don’t know what it means, but decide it is a response to the redesign of the Cracker Barrel logo.
Near the entrance there are two teenage boys walking toward me, throwing devil horns in a way that is clearly mocking. One of them looks at me and says, “Are you ready to rock?” And I, decked out in my Toilet ov Hell shirt and a Judas Priest dad hat, say, sincerely, “Yes. I am ready to rock.” They walk away, laughing and laughing. They think I am a big nerd. They are right.
I’ve missed the first band, Filth Spewer, which is a bummer since they’re fronted by Natalie McKay and I would have liked to see her in action. Alas.
As I walk around the grounds checking stuff out, I find a booth selling Filipino sweets. I ask, “Do you have anything vegan?” which I’ve asked four different vendors so far. This is the first one to say yes. Pinay Queen Lumpia for the win. I buy some purple muffin-looking things and some sticky rice. Both are really good. Then I buy a lemonade, which is huge and becomes a cumbersome thing to lug around, but I paid $8 for it and god damn it if I’m not going to drink the entire thing. Eventually. I have to pace myself to avoid the dreaded Port-a-Potties ov Hell.
Pets are not allowed at MMF, though there are some service dogs. I’m thrilled to meet a dog named Thumper who is hanging out at the All Species Kinship (ASK) tent. ASK is a Battle Creek-based organization that rescues animals of all kinds. I learn that he’s up for adoption and ask if I can take Thumper’s picture. It is difficult to get him to stop kissing his human handler’s face in order to do so. He’s a happy guy and not at all phased by the loud music.
Thumper, a handsome good boy available for adoption through All Species Kinship (ASK).
Errors of Humanity takes the stage and even though I’m far away from them I need to put my earplugs in. (To everyone who doesn’t wear earplugs at shows, I implore you to do so. You will really, really miss your hearing when you’re older. Trust me.)
I find a shady spot in the grass from where I can see the stage and sit on a Delta Airlines blanket that I stole from a plane. I send my wife and son a text that reads, “I’m sitting on a blanket in the grass listening to a band whose singer sounds like a terrifying squealing pig. I’m eating vegan sticky rice. I’m happy.”
The singer of Errors of Humanity is very disappointed with the crowd for not being in the pit. It is very sunny and it is hot, so most of us are sitting on the grass in the shade, a respectable distance from the stage. There is, however, a dedicated but small group of guys who have formed a pit near the front. “Let me see some fucking violence!” the singer yells. I scan the grounds, but do not see any.
As Milwaukee’s Illusion of Fate sets up, I move toward the front so I can get some pictures. The band is wearing lots of face paint. While this is not a requirement to play MMF, it does seem to help your chances as the bill is full of bands who wear facepaint and/or masks. It is A Thing.
After I snap a few pictures during the band’s first song, I move away from the front. I do this for several reasons: I want to be in the shade, the music sounds like shit when you’re two feet from the speakers, and the vocalist is encouraging people to make a circle pit, something I want no part of.
He tells the crowd to grab anyone who isn’t participating. “If they resist, grab them harder!” Somebody needs a lecture about consent. He will pay for this soon.
“Peel that fucking banana!” Illusion of Fate demands fruit-focused violence at Michigan Metal Fest 2025.
He then yells, “Somebody peel that fucking banana!” Because there’s a guy in the pit wearing a banana costume. Also A Thing. I find this very funny. I want MMF to make a shirt that says this. I would buy it.
The next band is Summoner’s Circle, a band I like very much. They describe themselves as “a six-piece theatrical metal band that blends elements of doom, death, black and progressive metal into what they refer to as simply Epic Metal.” Epic, indeed.
I stop by their merch booth and buy a CD of their first album and a t-shirt from Blind, who is credited with “lead throat and incantations” (a.k.a. vocals). He’s already done up in his corpse paint and spooky getup. I tell him that their newest album, Cult is really fucking good. Blind is pleased. “I put a lot of hate into that one,” he says in the very normal voice you would expect from a guy who is actually named Josh. “Well, it worked!” I reply.
I also tell him that Summoner’s Circle is the main reason I came to day one of the festival. “If you hadn’t been on the bill, I would have just come tomorrow,” I say. Blind then tells me that he has just learned that a band has dropped out of tomorrow’s lineup and Summoner’s Circle will be taking their place. I am happy for them. But I will also be sending them the bill for tonight’s hotel room.
The crowd has grown in size at this point. I see that the lead singer for Illusion of Fate is lurking at the back of the stage as Summoner’s Circle sets up. Why is he there? Is he going to do a song with them?
No. No, he is not. It turns out that he is there to be murdered. Before their first song starts, Blind slits the dude’s throat with a dagger. There’s blood and everything. The sacrifice falls to the floor. He then awkwardly scoots himself using his legs to the side of the stage. I am not fooled. He has survived. Blind does not seem to notice. Then again, he is Blind.
Blind, vocalist for Summoner’s Circle, slits the throat of King Morbid, vocalist for Illusion of Fate live on stage at Michigan Metal Fest 2025.
On stage, Blind does not sound like a guy named Josh when he talks. He actually sounds a lot like a possessed Oscar the Grouch. I don’t mean that as a dig. Oscar the Grouch takes no shit.
They play “Worm Tunnel” and Blind implores us to “run from the worms below.” They also play “Apostasy,” which is about a demon abortion, I think?
The set is great and I enjoy it very much. Later, I wear my new Summoner’s Circle on a late-night Meijer run for some Uncrustables. Because a tradition is a tradition.
Day 2
Knowing that I will not make it through the entire 10-hour festival I arrive about 1 p.m., which means I miss the first couple of bands. I head to the back of the festival grounds to the press tent where I am presented with an official MMF laminate that says PRESS. I put this proudly around my already very sweaty neck and vow to represent Toilet ov Hell with honor and dignity.
I hear the announcer (Terry Stevens from Q106, “Michigan’s Rock Station”) introduce Voluntary Mortification, a band I thought I had missed. I have no interest in a Christian metalcore band, even if they are from Michigan. Sure, you might say this is narrow-minded. But I don’t care. Come at me when I’m not living in a Christofascist country. Until then, I’ll get my metal from hell, thank you very much.
I ask the woman at the press table if the schedule has changed and she says it has. She shows me an image of the revised schedule on her phone. I ask her if she will text the image to me, but it doesn’t work. So I take a photo of her screen using my phone like a technological wizard.
Now that I’ve gotten the schedule sorted, I head over to the main stage to check out Dying Oath, a West Virginia band fronted by Mindy Jackson. Either she is wearing contacts or her eyes are possessed. She has on Nail Bite sweat shorts, which I make a mental note to look for at the Nail Bite merch booth later.
Dying Oath’s Mindy Jackson turns her detractors into dust, flanked by bassist Joey McDaniel and guitarist Josh Hagee.
“This one’s for the ladies!” Jackson says as they launch into “Mercy (of the Queen).” Jackson screams, “When you say I’m not good enough your words can never get in to break me.” I don’t know who this song is about, all I can say is that they pissed off the wrong woman.
There’s a pretty lively pit going during Dying Oath’s set. And unlike most pits, this one includes children. There’s a kid who is maybe 6 running around in between people. Then a guy runs up and holds an infant above a group of people who have linked arms and are headbanging. I worry this will end poorly, but thankfully the guy with the baby exits before things get rowdy again.
Next up is Ignominious from Ohio, who have brought a giant inflatable green monster for the crowd to toss around. They open their set with “Huge Alligator,” which is about a huge alligator and includes the lyrics, “Gator ate an ice cream truck. We are all fucked.”
The pit is going fucking nuts. Also, Banana Man is back.
Ignominious vocalist Colin Richardson and drummer Hyland Borkman bring reptilian violence to Michigan Metal Fest 2025.
Vocalist Colin Richardson announces the next song saying it’s about “getting run over by a fucking tractor.” The song, “Tractor Smasher,” is exactly that. Sample lyrics: “Tie your torso to the tractor and drag you through the cornfield.” They also play “Forklift Frenzy” (you’ll never guess what it’s about), and a song about the worst way to die, in Richardson’s opinion.
Traverse the Abyss open by playing a recording of the theme from The Office. Because they are from Scranton, Pennsylvania. I listen to their set while I sit on a bench and learn about native plants in the Miss Iva Doty Native Wildflower Garden away from all of the action, eating more Filipino treats. Did I mention that MMF is held at an arboretum? It is quite a beautiful place.
Next on the main stage, all the way from Florida, is Visitant. The band is fronted by Chelsea Marrow who used to be in Voraath. I saw Voraath at last year’s MMF. Because Marrow literally says “Voraath RIP” on stage, I take it the band has broken up. She dedicates Visitant’s last song to “friends we lost on New Year’s Eve.” At least I think that’s what she says. Since we live in such an incredibly violent country, I do not know what she is referring to. Perhaps those killed in New Orleans when a truck plowed into a crowd of people? I did just Google “Florida New Year’s Eve deaths” and found that at least three people across the state were killed by “celebratory” New Year’s gunfire.
Transitioning from real violence to cartoonish violence is The Convalescence with their “symphonic horror deathcore.” Lots of fake blood (OR IS IT?) and face makeup. Before their last song, the vocalist throws what I think is a rubber heart into the crowd and says that whoever has possession of it at the end of their set will get a free t-shirt. The audience is encouraged to kill each other for it. Soon a shirtless man in shorts and a fanny pack emerges with the heart held aloft. He is running faster than I’ve seen anyone run in a long time. At least three people are chasing him and they are all soon out of sight. The song ends, but no one has returned with the heart. Has Fanny Pack Man been murdered in the woods by his pursuers? After a brief moment, he emerges victorious. He has won a shirt. And since he is not wearing a shirt, this feels cosmically just.
Soon it begins to rain. Terry Stevens announces that there is a thunderstorm warning and if lightning appears we will all have to go get into our cars and wait it out. I do not want this to happen. Nail Bite, the band I am the most excited to see, is supposed to play next.
Nail Bite, from Pennsylvania, also played last year’s MMF, the only repeat band from 2024 as far as I can tell. They are very young and play a very interesting mix of genres that I can’t really nail down (HA). Metalcore? Death metal? Pop metal? I don’t know. All I know is that vocalist Lonna Nelson can switch between a girly pop croon and vocals that will crush your skull in a heartbeat.
When I visited their merch booth earlier in the day, I picked up their new EP Anomaly, which I didn’t even know was out, and a t-shirt. (I did not buy the shorts because they are made of a very heavy material. Good winter shorts, if you will.) The woman at the merch booth, who is probably one of the band member’s moms, tells me that Nail Bite has just signed with Napalm Records. Lonna and her brother Caiden, who plays keyboards in Nail Bite, were standing right there and so I congratulated them, had them sign my CD, and told them I was really looking forward to their set.
A set that may not happen now. Everyone is kind of shuffling around in the rain and I am mentally preparing myself to make a mad dash to my car. Then the rain simply stops. And out pops the sun.
I situate myself right in front, against the barrier in the hopes that I can get some good photos of Nail Bite. There is fake blood all over the place from The Convalescence. A man next to me uses his water bottle to try to wash some of it off so his young son can hold onto the barrier. The boy asks, “Is that real blood?” to which the man replies, “I don’t think so,” as he wipes it off with his bare hands.
Nail Bite make it through the rain (Barry Manilow reference!) to take the stage at Michigan Metal Fest 2025.
Nail Bite’s set is so much fun. They encourage the pit to get moving, but the pit is behind me so I cannot really see what is going on. Then a security guard signals to another security guard and they step forward to hoist a guy who is crowd surfing over the barrier. Soon there is another one. I consider moving away from the front, but when I look behind me the crowd is pretty thick. “I am stuck here,” I think, though not unhappily.
Nail Bite’s Lonna Nelson reversing the space-time continuum with her ferocity at Michigan Metal Fest 2025.
After Nail Bite, I consider heading over to the other stage to watch Summoner’s Circle again. But I am tired and my feet hurt and it is time for me to call it a day. I have no desire to see the headliner, Dying Fetus, or any of the remaining bands.
And so I head to my car (at a leisurely pace, not sprinting through a thunderstorm). As I pull away, I hear Summoner’s Circle begin their set. I’m kind of bummed to skip it, but at least now I don’t have to chase them down for hotel room costs.
This was my second time attending Michigan Metal Fest. It is clear to me how much work and love goes into putting this festival together. I truly appreciate the MMF staff and volunteers, the sponsors, the bands, and the people who attend. While I do spend most of my time avoiding pits and stalking around the grounds like a drifter who was born to walk alone, I definitely never feel lonely. Can’t wait until next year.
