Mortiis – The Shining Lamp Of God: A Video Breakdown
I’m gonna let it shine, I’m gonna let it shine
Heaven send a light, let it shine on me
Hey yeah, Hey yeah
In my earliest days of speaking to people on the internet about metal, Mortiis was spoken of in less than kind terms. Some didn’t like the music, but I think most of it was because of their “look”. Also, because meal fans + the internet = argle bargle. These were the days before you could easily find and listen to songs (yay dial-up!), so I never really knew what Mortiis sounded like. I just had the strange pictures of Mr. Mortiis himself to form an opinion. I like this one because it looks like it belongs in a Sexy Mortiis Of The Month calendar. It’s like a D & D character mated with Gary from the video store that’s still somehow in business.
Formed in 1993, Mortiis went on hiatus back in 2011, but lucky us, they are back and have provided us with a shiny new video. Now we’ll know if the musical curtains match the prosthetic makeup drapes, if you know what I mean.
0:02: Yes, it’s literally a one-eyed snake.
0:06: The Slipknot fans are here.
0:10: And the Dream Theater fans.
0:17: Mortiis has really spruced up his meth lab.
0:23: Everyone please give a round of applause for Ms. Helena Bonham Carter.
0:30: Video shot at Tetanusland. Come to Tetanusland for all your tetanus needs.
0:36: Without the makeup, he looks a bit like Dani Filth’s younger brother Morti Filth.
0:42: “Morti Q. Filth! Clean your room this instant or no spotted dick for you!”
0:48: You might want to get those open sores looked at.
0:54: The things he’s done to that poor skull…
0:59: Ah, yes. “The Big Book Of Lolbuttz”
1:02: Come on, Morti. Use a napkin to clean up your jelly!
1:10: Well this turned into a Japanese body horror movie quickly.
1:17: Now Donald Trump’s spokewoman has a new necklace.
1:19: Of course I didn’t just make that up.
1:25: It’s the newest dance craze. Everyone do the “Death Twitch”!
1:31: Mortiis: The Dr. Nick Riviera of the music world.
1:39: It’s the She-Bitch from Army of Darkness!
1:45: And she’s got dance moves up the wazoo.
1:52: Shaky cam provided by every second-rate action movie of the past 10 years.
1:59: This is what happens if you keep picking at it.
2:03: Looks like Mortiis is whipping up a batch of homemade Guacamole Jim.
2:08: The service at Applebees has really gone downhill.
2:13: The effects of the food are still the same.
2:22: I’m beginning to question Dr. Mortiis’s medical expertise.
2:26: Who did he study under? Dr. Love? Dr. Feelgood? Dr. Demento?
2:31: This song really makes me want to watch the Spawn live-action movie.
2:37: “Dear diary, today I fed a grimy corpse-person some slop. #Adulting.”
2:43: Looks like someone is due for a trip to Yankee Candle.
2:56: When does Christina Aguilera come out to sing “Beautiful”?
3:02: Open this pit up!
3:08: Porno mags are weird in Norway.
3:18: Sooooo many jars of urine.
3:26: A spinkick that would make any fan of Throwdown smile.
3:35: “Don’t forget to feed the people hanging on your wall! You have responsibilities now, Morti!”
3:41: “I’m not cleaning that up, Morti Filth.”
3:45: Well, what will Donald Trump’s spokewoman wear now?
Well that was a nice bit of industrial rock/metal. Maybe getting rid of the dark elf cellar synth master makeup was the right move. Don’t you think?
Mortiis’s album The Great Deceiver will be out on March 4th, 2016. The first single (and remix by Wumpscut) is available for free here.
