Tech Review: The 2008 Nissan Altima 3.5SE

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Friends, this is a blog that does music reviews, cooking recipes, work-out advice, and video games… you need might as well hear about one of the greatest pieces of technology on the road: the 2008 Nissan Altima 3.5SE. Not only is it a fantastic vehicle but it also helps spread the greatness of the heavy metal scene around the world and provides a spectacular listening environment for some of your favorite heavy metal (or high-profile, female-fronted pop) albums. You’ve seen my series “What’s In Your Six Disc Changer?” and it stems from this beautiful technological advancement which I drive to work every day. It’s Tech Review time…

About three years ago I traded in a Mazda RX-8 that was getting high up in miles for a vehicle that would have to fill some mighty big shoes there, as the RX-8 was one of the best handling sportscars on the road for under six figures. But the engine of that thrashin’ sports car was odd and unforgiving, and it wasn’t an efficient adult car. It was time to trade in for something with front wheel drive, something that had a coupla horsepower and most importantly something that would be fun to drive. All those requirements were met with the Nissan Altima 3.5SE equipped with a manual transmission, released in the year of our lord 2008.

(Nicki Minaj would be proud of this curvaceous rump.)

The engine equipped with the higher trim level was a throaty VQ35DE that was also used in cars like the 350Z and the Maxima. It’s got some horsepower, baby… 270 to be exact. Weighing in at less than 3300 pounds and matched with a 6-speed manual transmission, you’ve got yourself a fast city scooter there! The ride is stiff enough to for high-speed entrances onto curved highway on-ramps and small-time autocross experiences through a mid-sized metropolitan city. It’s no sacrifice to ride quality though, as it’ll fit up to four passengers comfortably with leather seats (which allows the driver and passenger to warm their lolbuttz with heating elements).

This trim level of vehicle comes with the Bose brand 9-speaker stereo system and six disc changer. The audio quality is tough to beat with any stock stereo system I have ever heard, from any passenger vehicle. Component speakers help provide a crisp high-end from dash-mounted tweeters, mids fire heathily from the bottom of the door woofers, and there’s even a small subwoofer in the trunk. While Winds of Leng is given all the high-wattage clarity it needs to pierce the city stratosphere, Nicki Minaj is also offered the necessary earth-shattering bass to level city blocks through windows lowered via electronically-controlled motors. And If I don’t want to listen to any of the many CD’s stored in the spacious glove box, I can plug in a Microsoft Zune HD via auxiliary input port as well. I think it also has Sirius/XM capability, but I will never again use those services because their idea of a heavy metal channel usually involves a radio program featuring the Jose Mangin character whom Joseph warned us about years ago.

(Speaking of six disc changers, what do you have in yours? That’s Grethor, Lady Gaga, Vacivus, Sarcoptes, Lor, and Dying Fetus.)

Fuel efficiency is reasonably rated, as I can average up to 29 miles per gallon highway and it often gives me about 18 mpg when zipping around these stop-and-go city streets. Those are numbers I can easily accept when coming from a 270 horsepower, 3.5-liter, 24-valve monster V6 mated to a 6-speed manual. I will get you to your destination on time, is what I’m trying to say, and we’re going to listen to some great music whilst doing so.

Three years ago I drove 4.5 hours away to blindly purchase this gem of a vehicle (2008 was the last year that a V6 was offered with a manual) and from a large-ish used car dealership located in a small town that was run by what seemed like a cult; traded in a trusty Mazda RX-8 that gave me tens of thousands of miles of formula 1-like thrills; and drove home with the best Dad vehicle I have ever owned. It handles exceptionally well for a mid-size sedan, boasts plenty of horsepower for passing slow idiots on the interstates, and includes just about all the creature comforts a person could want… and at a cost way less than any new vehicle. FFO: Honda Accord, Mazda 6, exhilaration. I cannot think of a better car on the road than the 2008 Nissan Altima 3.5SE with 6-speed manual transmission. It gets an easy 6 out of 5 Flaming Toilets ov Hell:

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(6 out of 5)

(Image via a Google Nexus 6.)

*Please support your grassroots death metal bands and high-profile, female-fronted pop artists.*

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