The Biggest Disappointments of 2015

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Are you excited for what Santa will bring you tomorrow? Too bad. Santa isn’t real and you ain’t getting shit for Xmas.

2015 is almost in the books. We’ve celebrated the very best albums of the year with our writers, editors, community, and celebrity guests. We’ve picked the best riff, the best songs, and the worst album art of the year. All that’s left is bitter disappointment. What pinched a loaf in a fancy box, wrapped it up in pretty paper, and handed it to you expectantly this year? Let us know below.

Ufomammut – Ecate

I really liked ORO, and the return to the riff on Ecate seemed great. And it was. Until it wasn’t. Maybe it’s something in the atmosphere or the impossibility of following up a masterpiece, but Ecate wore off on me big time. Should have been a top 10 album, ended up the disappointment of the year.  — Karhu

 

Urfaust-Apparitions-12-MLP_2460Urfaust – Apparitions

I like melodies and atmosphere, but sometimes I can get dragged down to the black metal void and be seduced by that dark romanticism. Records by bands like Cult of Fire delivered me a (un)healthy dose of obscure mysticism, but Apparitions was a huge letdown for a tedious half hour of songs pulled by weak horses. By “The River”, the final dark ambient track (and the longest on the album) I was completely asleep by the hollow touches of a couple of keyboards. Do not blame me, Urfaust is a good band, but this record was a no-no for me  — Link Leonhart

Melecesh – Enki

Damnit, Melechesh. I wanted to like this album. I really did. You are one of my favorite metal bands of all time. You had an epic four album winning streak (As Jerusalem Burns is decent but not on par with everything that came after). I liked the slightly bigger emphasis on the exotic black/thrash of old this album seemed to be taking. I liked the single “Lost Tribes”, despite the presence of Max Cavalera. Too bad that, and opening track “Tempest Temper Enlil Enraged” are the only decent cuts on this record songwriting-wise. Between the somewhat lazy song structures and the abysmal production (“concert pitch” my ass), Enki snags the unenviable title of disappointment of the year. Sad part is, it was almost a toss up between this record and Ares Kingdom‘s The Unburiable Dead. You are better than this, guys.  — Simon Phoenix

Action Bronson – Mr. Wonderful

Bronslino thought it would be clever to smoke so much weed while making this album, that it created a bubble that he could not see outside of. You don’t drop a very good album followed by a slew of equally good mixtapes and drop this piece of excrement. It’s OK buddy, your arch rival, Ghostface Killah will be dropping Supreme Clientele 2 soon and he’ll show you how it’s done.  — Ron Deuce

 

Enslaved – In Times

I absolutely adored RIITIIR. It hit me in just the right places with its epic blend of proggy goodness and pagan black metal defiance. In comparison, In Times just felt like a wet blanket. All the parts were there, but nothing moved me. It’s not you, Enslaved. It’s me.  — W.

 

 

Danzig – Skeletons

I was fully-prepared to like Danzig’s cover album, but alas it was a steaming heap of dogshit on all accounts. I’d rather run a drill bit through both of my eardrums than suffer that again.  — JAG

 

 

Nightfell – Darkness Evermore

In 2014, Nightfell released The Living Ever Mourn, which ended up being my number 5 album of the year. My anticipation for their 2015 followup Darkness Evermore was almost palpable. Unfortunately, while the album is certainly a solid effort, it does not deliver the same emotional viscera, and the songs are not as tight and focused, leading me to declare it an official sophomore slump.  — Celtic Frosty

 

This has been a tough year. No new music from Mammoth Grinder, this site isn’t growing as quickly as I had hoped it would, and Taylor Swift continues to spurn my advances. — Joe Thrashnkill

My plan to move to Norway and become a billionaire didn’t work out. FML. — CyberneticOrganism

I am a constant disappointment — Randall Thor

Everything. — 365 Days of Horror

post-31569-kevin-sorbo-disappointed-gif-I-cSOz

 

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