This Toilet Tuesday (7/14/15)


It’s 3AM. You’ve just finished playing a show, and even though you’ve been up all day, you’re still wired and riding the high that comes with a good performance. You’ve got a long road ahead of you tonight yet; you need to be at the venue for tomorrow’s show early, so you want to get to the next city as soon as possible. Knowing you’ll need some extra energy before getting on the highway, you decide to stop at the only place open at this godless hour: the local Perkins. When you open the menu, something catches your eye immediately. Something wonderful and terrible. Though you know it will spell your doom, you know you must order it: the Hearty Man Special. Before long, a small mountain of greasy breakfast food has been placed before you. You tear into it with the voracity of a starved wolf.

You face most of the next day without consequence. The drive was fine, you got in some sleep once you made it to town, and you were even able to do a little sightseeing before setting up for the night. Just when you think you’re in the clear, it hits you at the worst possible time; the start of your set. You grit your teeth and try to hold it back, but you don’t know how long you can last. Something slimy is working its way through your lower intestines, and the reverberations from your bass seem to be speeding it up. Just when you think all is lost, you feel a tap on your shoulder. One of the bartenders, clearly having seen this before, has crept up behind you with a bucket and gives you a knowing nod. When a two measure guitar fill happens, you drop your pants and squat. The bartender slams the bucket against your bare ass as you simultaneously open your anal floodgates and unleash a savage howl into the microphone. The audience goes wild at the spectacle. You have triumphed this night.

immortal bird

Immortal Bird – Empress/Abscess (Broken Limb/Manatee Rampage) [Death/Grind/Sludge]
Listen to “Neoplastic,” “Saprophyte”

The fact that Immortal Bird have been given a feature on NPR seems to indicate a significant amount of hype for the band’s debut album. Based on the two tracks that have been released so far, it seems likely that the band will live up to that acclaim. In the course of a single track, this quartet proves that this is a group to watch, summoning primordial elements from the swamps of hideous sludge and transmuting them through black metal alchemy into a briny, forgotten colossus from the ancient world that marches with a mechanical Cult of Luna-esque step and attacks with a vicious Carcass-esque rhythmic assault. Rae Amitay’s gorgon vocals add the finishing siren song to the monstrosity, luring all listeners to their doom upon the jagged rocks. Impressive stuff. FFO: Emperor, Intronaut, False (W.)

old keeper

Old Witch/Keeper – Old Witch/Keeper (split- Grim Cvlt) [Blackened Doom]

Fans of sludge and doom should already be familiar with Keeper. I imagine many of you, however, are unfamiliar with their partners on this split. Thankfully, I can report that Old Witch bring the goods. From the moment those ghastly, Baba Yaga vocals kick in over the slimy, bubbling riffs, you’ll be hooked. Old Witch certainly throw down the gauntlet on the first four tracks, demonstrating a surprising amount of diversity in their hideous sludge, but Keeper do not disappoint in the way they close. This may be the sludge split/collaboration to beat for 2015. FFO: The Body, Catacombs, Sea Bastard (W.)


Ambassador Gun – Tomb of Broken Sleep (Independent) [Grindcore]

I’m not going to claim to be the Toilet’s leading expert on grind (or anything really, besides butt-centric flash fiction). All I know is that when I hit play on Ambassador Gun’s “Invaders,” there was a bunch of loud noise and screaming, and then everything was hazy for a bit, and then I found myself standing amidst the trashed remains of my living room. I felt satisfied afterwards though, so I’ll count that as a good thing. I can see Tomb of Broken Sleep potentially making year-end lists (my own included); though it sits on the cleaner side of grind, the songwriting is more than competent, the production is full, and it’s incredibly pissed. Look for it this Wednesday on their Bandcamp, with physical releases to come later this summer. (Spear)

Al Azif – Sombras Sobre Una Pared Calcinada (Rock-CD Records) [Death Metal]

Alchemy Crystal – Kyuuen no Eishyou (Independent) [Power Metal]

Autarcie/Baise Ma Hache – Ultra Ritual (Purity Through Fire) [Black Metal]
Listen to “Ultra Ritual” (Autarcie)

Black Leather – Sin Cuerdas (Independent) [Black Metal]

Bodybag – Predominance of Insanity (Living Dead Society/Unholy Prophecies/Noise Not War) [Grindcore]

Crusifire – Garden of Fire (Independent) [Thrash]

Cuff/Disfiguring the Diseased/Embryonic Devourment/Macropsia/Splattered Entrails – s/t (split- Morbid Generation Records) [Brutal Death/Grind]

Defect Designer – Ageing Accelerator (Sleazy Rider Records) [Death Metal]
Listen to “The Terrible,” “Crusaders”

Ectovoid – Dark Abstraction (Hellthrasher Productions) [Black Metal]
Listen to “Mental Netherworlds,” “The Expanse Between Slumber and Death”

Enertia – Piece of the Factory (Tribunal/Divebomb) [Thrash]
Listen to “Demons of Silence,” “Beside You, Beside Me”

Fferyllt – Achanterez (Fire Light Records) [Folk Metal]
Listen to “Call of the Wild”

Furtherial – Un Mondo Infinito (Wormhole Death/The Orchard) [Melodeath]
Listen to “Beneath the Stars”

Gurthang/Beyond Life – Melodies of Sorrow (Cimmerian Shade Recordings) [Black Metal/Doom]
Listen to “Heavy Rain” (Beyond Life)

Gutalax – Shit Happens (Rotten Roll Rex) [Grindcore]

Hatevömit – Necrövömit (Underground Resistance/Satanath) [Black Metal]
Listen to “Howling Rapture of Mighty Death”

Hellbastard – Feral (Patac Records) [Thrash]
Listen to “We Are Coven”

KLLK – Between the First Heliocentric Wind and the Great Devourer of Light (Mithra! Infrasound) [Doom]
Listen to “Antithesa Mahatma”

Merkfolk – The Folk Bringer (Art of the Night Productions) [lolbuttz]
Listen to “Topielica”

Mourned By Flies – Far Beyond the Grave (Independent) [Melodeath]

Ommadon – Empathy for the Wicked (Golden Mantra) [Drone/Doom]

Orchid – Sign of the Witch (Nuclear Blast) [Doom]
Listen to “Sign of the Witch”

Organ Dealer – [Visceral Infection] (Horror Pain Gore Death) [Grindcore]

Paul Wardingham – The Human Affliction (Independent) [Instrumental Prog]

Powerwolf – Blessed & Possessed (Napalm Records) [Power Metal]
Listen to “Armata Strigoi”

Prophets of Saturn – Retronauts (HeviSike Records) [Doom]
Listen to “Retronaut”

Ragnaröek – Dornig (Trollzörn) [Folk Metal]
Listen to “Trinkfest 5-4-3-2-1”

RazorRape – Orgy in Guts (Rotten Roll Rex) [Goregrind]

Red Razor – Beer Revolution (Independent) [Thrash]
Listen to “Wish You Were Beer”

Reverie – Bliss (Invictus Productions) [Black Metal]
Listen to “Blood in the Sea”

Serrabulho – Star Whores (Rotten Roll Rex) [Grindcore]
Listen (NSFW)

Sweet Cobra – Earth (Magic Bullet Records) [Sludgy Punk]
Listen to “Future Ghosts”

Trojan – Archaic Dimension (Sepsis Records) [Death Metal]

Undercode – Post-Apocalyptic (Independent) [Heavy Metal]
Listen to “Driven,” “Final Fight”

Volcano – Melt (Metallic Core) [Thrash]

Wülfhook – The Impaler (Tribunal Records) [Heavy/Power Metal]
Listen to “The Impaler,” “Brutal Nightmare”

Zombie Death Stench – Infected (Turkey Vulture Records) [Death/Groove Metal]
Listen to “Warbeast”

Did we forget a new release? Is there a way we could improve this list? Let us know in the comments below!

(Images VIA, VIA, and VIA)

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