Triptykon – Tree Of Suffocating Souls: A Video Breakdown
There’s minimalist and then there are Triptykon videos.
Triptykon is the vehicle for Tom G. Warrior post his departure from the highly influential band Celtic Frost. It’s funny to think of CF as being both lovingly praised with some of their releases and widely ridiculed for others coughColdLakcough. I thoroughly enjoyed the band’s return album Monotheist, which was actually my first real introduction to the band. It was dark and mysterious with Gabriel’s hollow voice creating each haunting word. I also remember their video for “A Dying God Coming Into Human Flesh”. It was simple, yet effective. Not a whole heck of a lot happens, but it manages to work well with song. Fast forward to today and Warrior’s Triptykon takes a stab with the same approach. Will lightning strike twice?
0:06: Wow, Tom Warrior is looking pretty good. He must moisturize.
0:10: Yep…that sure is a left hand. Let’s focus on it a few more seconds.
0:15: Oooo, now the right hand gets it’s time to shine.
0:23: Aaaand now the drummer’s face for a few seconds. Was there a spider on the camera and the cameraman was afraid to move it?
0:28: What is that? It looks like a horse’s tail.
0:40: This video already has more shots of flowing hair than a commercial for Nair.
0:46: Ok intro, you can finish up any time now.
0:54: Dear god, what’s that sad melting clown with the knit hat doing in Triptykon?
0:55: Oh wait, that’s Tom Warrior. Yeesh, I guess I was wrong about the moisturizing.
1:00: And his hair looks like it was taken from an old Muppet.
1:07: Um…aren’t the vocals supposed to be matching his mouth movements?
1:18: Why even bother having a cable for bass? There aren’t any amps around.
1:24: Tom Warrior’s soul patch. That’s it. That’s the joke.
1:34: If that camera were any closer, we’d be able to smell his breath.
1:39: It’s hard to be minimalist when you shoot from every possible angle.
1:47: Seriously, when do we get the shot from beneath Tom Warrior’s balls?
2:00: Left AND right hands shot at the same time. Wowzers.
2:08: Sure, film the solo from an angle where you can’t see his hands. Why not?
2:16: Bounce bounce bounce like you’re in an Aversions Crown video.
2:30: I wonder where Tom Warrior gets his hats from.
2:35: You think he knits them himself?
2:36: Or does he go to the store and ask to see something in the “Grim and Tall” section?
2:44: That bass is getting more screen time than Steven Seagal in Executive Decision.
2:57: OG Warrior bounce!
3:07: His hair is looking fried. Dude needs to lather, rinse, repeat. Always repeat.
3:27: Warrior’s got the “Ehhhh, I guess this is ok” look, like he just ate plain oatmeal.
3:38: Black eyes. The most painful eye color possible…uh, other than pink.
3:50: Man, he’s got a pointy chin. He could slice cheese with that thing.
4:16: So…is anything, like, going to happen in this video?
4:25: I only ask because we’re about halfway through. Just, y’know, curious.
4:42: Maybe it’s one of those slow builds like “House Of The Devil” where absolutely nothing happens for 90% of the movie and then the end is all an intense mindfuck.
4:50: Sloooowww mooooooo fooorrrrr nooooooooo reeeeeaassssooonnnnnn.
4:52: This solo should come with a free stick of incense.
5:25: I’m beginning to suspect that this isn’t a slow build.
5:29: BYAH!
5:45: Problem with the “everything in your video is black” idea? Smudges on your guitar.
6:00: Ok, there’s definitely nothing happening in this video.
6:09: Now that I think about it, there aren’t even trees in it! Missed opportunity!
6:15: Alright, I’m going to make a turkey sandwich.
6:17: Let me know if I miss anything.
6:20: Just kidding.
6:26: Do you want anything from the kitchen?
6:42: Where’s that damn mustard?
6:58: I found it. It was behind the Cholula.
7:13: I’m going to have some chips. Want me to just bring the whole bag?
7:22: Did I miss anything? Yeah, I didn’t think so.
7:41: I think Tom nodded off. I don’t blame him.
7:47: Great. Now everyone in the band is in a coma.
Eight minutes. Eight minutes of nothing that you’ll never get back. What was the point? Most won’t sit through all of that just to watch it. They’ll probably put in on just to the song while doing other things. At that point, they might as well have just uploaded the song with a picture of the band accompanying it.
In making the video, Warrior said, “As intensely minimalist as Triptykon‘s approach and music are, as perfect and passionate was [director] Philipp [Hirsch] in creating images which combine such minimalism with the required darkness. “
You know what else would have been minimalist? NOT FILMING A VIDEO. That would have been the most minimal thing of all. Much easier too.
