Morbid Angel Bootleg Baseball Jersey
Formulas Fatal To The Forced Out
We’re at the half-way point in this year’s baseball season. Maybe your team is doing well. Maybe they’re not. Maybe you’re one of those totally funny people that refer to all major league events as “sportsball”. (You’re totally funny, by the way, keep doing it. We’re all laughing, you just can’t see or hear it.) There’s a chance you may get tickets to a game, so you have to look the part. But what if you only look at the world through the lens of death metal? Well, then have I got the baseball jersey for you!
Yes, this bootleg Morbid Angel jersey matches perfectly with your Evil D cowboy hat and Trey Azagooglegoth Sailor Moon poster. Camo may not be the best design for a baseball jersey, but there is precedence. Does that make it better? No, it’s still ugly as hell. You may hear Altars Of Madness when you see this, but all I hear is Illud Divinum Insanus covers played by a broken kazoo.
Now, I’m not above getting a bootleg jersey as a gift for someone. Mostly because I’m not the one wearing it. It’s a crapshoot as to what you get, if you get it at all. There’s a chance it may never get delivered. Sometimes they come out well. Sometimes they give you a rash. Sometimes you wake up in a seedy bathtub full of ice, your kidney missing, and you have to work in a sweatshop to try to make enough money to get home.
If you do get this Morbid Angel bootleg baseball jersey, I ask you one thing. One simple thing that I would considered a personal favor. Can you please sing “Where The Slime Live” to the tune of “Take Me Out To The Ball Game”? Thank you.
