RIFF OV THE WEEK: 11/15/14


It’s freezing and I’m too much of a cxheap bastard to run the heat, so I’ve decided to just type in my gloves. I’ve also fecided to leave any and all typos resulting from the currently numb abnd begloved status of my hands in deep, artistic protest of bothb the weather and the preposterous cost of keepng a 60-year old, poorly-insulated house wartm. Fucj winter.

Last weekCoolstorybro did what no othrr man would do: The right thing. And he was rewarded with victory.

“Rainbow in the Dark” was the only answer, and everyone who didn’;t think of it (I am among the accused) should hang their heads in poserly shame and beseech the great Ronnie James Dio to forgive their metal insolence. What were the runner-ups? “Rainbow in the Dark,” and “Rainbow in the Dark” again. Hail Coolstorybro.

Also, get a load of these dorks!





It happens to the best of us, guys. Except Coolstorybro.

Business time:

  • Next week, as suggested by Max, we’re doing strictly start-stop riffs. What are those? You should know. But if you don’t, here’s some Maxplanation:

“Back in the days before Guitar Hero and isolated tracks uploaded to The Tube of You, riffs with lots of rests were the only time you ever got to hear what the drums sounded like without the guitars over them on a metal record. So I always looked forward to those parts of a song.They also make a guitar sound seem heavier; because if you’re just hearing it continuously you get numb to it. It can be abused though; nu-metal always had too much of them, whereas black metal barely had them at all.”

  • Send your start-stop riffs to toiletovhell@gmail.com. Remember, they come in quick.
  • Tell me if you have any ideas for themed riffs in the comment section.
  • I love you guys.


Masterlord Steel Dragon

Abazagorath summoning the melodic black metal tremolo riff’s final form. Genericness perfected.


Joe Thrashnkill

Recently we discussed punks that could (improbably) shred. A Wilhelm Scream came to mind immediately. One of my favorite tracks by the band “The Horse” is the best argument that progressive punk could be a viable and totally absurd genre. Starting at 0:22 a tapping bass line comes in and is soon joined by a complimentary guitar line at 0:39. If you’re not air guitaring (or bassing) to this, you have no soul.



When Pestilence came back from the dead five years ago, it was as a wholly different animal. Less OSDM and more dissonant death, the main riff that kicks off this whole gnarly track sounds like some extra-dimensional Hound of Tindalos infected with otherworldly rabies tearing at you with foaming mouth from every corner in your tiny apartment simultaneously.



When “Antartica” kicks in at 1:18 after the spoken word intro, it’s like the actual Antarctica is actually kicking in. What does it mean for an icy, hellish wasteland of a continent to kick in? Listen to The Great Old Ones and find out, ya jabronis.


Howard Dean

Katharsis. I’ve submitted two riffs and a solo from this band. Maybe I like them a little?! Raw as tartare and maniacally catchy hymns of devilworship. Obey the serpent. 1:24.



Something has happened to me over the last couple of weeks, in which I have taken instrumental music far more seriously than I ever had before. Part of the reason is Sannhet. Sannhet play instrumental post-black metal, and do not play grindcore. They released Known Flood in 2013 to much fanfare and acclaim, and for good reason. “Moral,” a short track about halfway through the album, builds and builds on the “post” aspect of their sound with a direct drum beat and fast riffs, until the whole thing explodes at 1:37. Check out the track, check out THOSE RIFFS at 1:37.


Nordling Rites Ov Karhu

Enochian Crescent gave black metal a twist like no other. “Väkisinkastettu” delivers right from the start. No tremolo picked hoarfrost worship, just pure, melodic madness in honor of Satan. If that is not your choice for the single catchiest moment in BM, you are a big fat liar. And you know it.


Satan Ov Hell

The opening acoustic riff to Sombre’s “Mater Maternis” is a piece of perfectly executed DSBM glory, mournful, sorrowful, and builds the atmosphere for their entire discography. It is repeated often, which helps really drive home the feeling, especially as the distortion kicks in.



Broken Hope, “Skin Is In”, first riff in the song. I DARE ANYONE not to think this is killer.


Brock Samson

It’s Mayhem at their prime. What more needs to be said. A neck brace will be required to enjoy this ride.


Jack Bauer

This is one of those riffs that takes you by the neck and says “you’re going to headbang to my song and there is nothing you can do about it so you might as well just start now.”


George Lynch

As a card carrying Lifelover, I feel obliged to introduce you guys to Chon. The riff starts of 0:00 to 0:21. The video is a play through of their tune and it is great (watching them play is great!). THEY HAVE RIFFS FOR DAYS. Check them out!



That main intro riff hooks me hard. It’s got a nice groove to it and for those who were talking pick scrapes last week…


Link D. Leonhart V

The English gentleman of Paradise Lost helped to define the Death/Doom movement, and they really know how to blend the emotive melodies with the melancholy in the rhythmic section very well. I’ve been listening to the Greg Macintosh guitar tone during the past few months and, to me, it’s one of the best musical exports of England. In every album he gets this massive and resonating sound in the six strings. This song was later retelled in “Universal Dream” from the Death Unites Us – Faith Divides Us album of 2009. And they both rule!



[yop_poll id=”16″]
Did you dig this? Take a second to support Toilet ov Hell on Patreon!
Become a patron at Patreon!