Shirt Stains: Cradle Of Anime
Many years ago, when this website was in its infancy, there was a meme of ‘No anime’. I don’t know where it started or how it came to be, but it was there in the comments and in some articles. Like most memes, it wasn’t particularly funny to begin with and quickly became annoying. Since most of those people have moved on, were banned, or became full-blown fascists, I think we can let that non-rule slide. Especially in the case of this Cradle Of Filth limited edition merchandise sold through Rockabilia, your number one source for Pantera workshirts and band keychains.
This shirt gets an akanbe, am I right, you weebs? Made in collaboration with tattoo artist Brando Chiesa, the ‘Seduce And Destroy’ (shudder) design features a big-tiddy anime lady in a Vampirella outfit, holding a bloody Darksouls dagger, sitting atop a giant Dani Filth head. Man, he was filled with a lot of raspberry jam, huh? No dry crumpets in the Filth household, let me tell you.
What’s the perspective on this? Does this mean Danime Filth has some sort of giant, durian-sized head or is the anime lady really small? Either way, I feel like this is catering to some very specific fetishes. And don’t think I didn’t notice the foot on his head. There’s a little something for a lot of people on this one. Has anyone checked if if Rex Ryan is into One Piece and Godspeed On The Devil’s Thunder?
Oh, snap! It’s the Halloween Spirit from Teen Titans Go, fool. “This Is Halloween” from The Nightmare Before Christmas follows this shirt around. It just plays on a loop, but it’s played on a tuba. If you walk into a Hot Topic with this on, they give you the key to the store and tell you to lock up when you’re done.
Need something to wear in the colder months, but can’t decide on which four-sided death metal one to wear? You’re in luck because this also comes in longsleeve. You’re in even more luck because the longsleeve version has a 666 sketched on it. Isn’t that adorable? Who’s a lil blasphemer? Who’s an itty bitty teeny tiny widdle Feccand Buggery? You are! Yes you are!
Love the design, but don’t want to wear it to work/church/court proceedings? Now you can have this in your home as a wall scroll. It can hang there…staring at you…judging you. Oh, look! It has the Led Zeppelin angel on it. How fancy.
And here it is in black just in case you don’t want it clashing with your furniture. Imagine convincing someone you’re normal enough that they go to your room and they see this on the wall. How long do they stay there? That is, if the stench emanating from where you sleep doesn’t knock them out, of course. It would be a real Musk And Her Embrace situation.