Boris The Blade – The Human Hive: A Video Breakdown
Should I call you Boris or Mr. The Blade?
Everyone enjoys a good reference. I particularly like ones from The Simpsons and Mel Brooks movies. Eagle-eyed readers can probably pick out a few of each in a lot of my writing. When a reference is used in a particularly clever or appropriate way, it can really connect with an audience. That’s why it’s no surprise to see bands using references from other places.
Boris The Blade was a character from the 2000 crime comedy Snatch, written and directed by Guy Ritchie. Boris, an arms-dealer played by Croatian actor Rade Serbedzija, was a pretty cool character and with a nickname like “The Blade”, you can easily see why a band would use it for a name.
Boris The Blade is an Australian deathcore band on Siege of Amida/Century Media Records. I’ve seen their name on the lower end of a few package tours and festivals. The most emotion I could elicit was “I get that reference.” Mission accomplished, I suppose, though I never bothered to listen to them until now. Let’s see if the music can live up to the name.
0:01: Spinkick Productions, a subsidiary of TriStar Pictures.
0:04: More like “Blarghdfh the Blarghde”
0:09: 9 seconds in and we already have a grammatical error.
0:10: “That’s a lovely skull tattoo, sir. Where can I get one for my child?”
0:16: That’s how you get dysentery. Didn’t you play Oregon Trail as a kid?
0:22: I can’t tell if he’s a man covered in tattoos or tattoos covered in man.
0:27: It’s Krang from Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles!
0:35: I’m a little disappointed he has an actual nose ring instead of a tattoo of a ring on his nose.
0:38: Hey, isn’t this that show that causes seizures? (See, Simpsons reference!)
0:47: That’s some sweet production on this song. You can almost actually hear instruments and vocals.
0:55: Soooo is anyone else in this band or….?
1:01: And his neck tattoos don’t count as other members.
1:04: Cells, parasites, infection. Trojan Condoms, proud sponsor of Boris The Blade.
1:09: Seizures, also a proud sponsor of Boris The Blade.
1:16: And why isn’t his soul patch a tattoo either? Commit all the way!
1:27: DJ Br00tal Drumz is really pounding them artificial skins.
1:36: Did they really need to put a bunch of bad effects over riot footage? Riot footage is good enough as it is.
1:41: The squiggly lines by his eyebrow represent his love of squiggly lines.
1:47: Brains go in here.
1:53: Sometimes it’s better to just not do a lyrics video.
2:05: Oh good, I was hoping this video would have ham-fisted messages.
2:14: “We are the generation of the damned”. Thanks a lot, millenials with your Twitters, selfies, and ice bucket challenges.
2:17: Hey, that’s not very nice.
2:25: His hands must’ve really hurt after this video was done.
2:34: The chinstrap tattoo either says “suffer” or “supper”. I’m going with supper.
2:41: This song is inspired by several terrible geocities and .cjb.net conspiracy websites.
2:48: Yeah, too much Sunny Delight will do that to you.
3:02: Whelp, that probably contributes to the whole damned generation thing.
3:08: Putting the “stink” in extinction.
3:19: Fire, walk with me.
3:24: HAHAHAHAHAHA
3:32: There’s no use crying over spilled blood of man.
3:40: There was a director? Really?
Chuggity chug chug chug chuggity chug chug chug. This probably would’ve been more tolerable as just a straight lyrics video, but not by much. Why bother having the vocalist do all the hand movements and junk? Maybe it’s really just to distract from the lyrics. Does Boris The Blade live up to their namesake? That’s for you to decide.
Boris The Blade’s album The Human Hive is available now via Century Media.
