The Mailmanbro Cometh: Show Us Your Haul!
Legend tells of a hero. A hero who will free us from the shackles of tyranny placed upon us by General Bethlehem. A hero who will teach a young Ford Lincoln Mercury to lead a broken and miserable people. A hero who will deliver hope in the form of a stamped parcel. This is that hero’s story.
Metalheads love their physical media. Whether it’s vinyl records, compact discs, or nearly defunct cassette tapes, the acquisition of tangible manifestations of the music we love is one of metal’s most time-honored traditions. If the stats are to be believed, this level of obsessive consumerism in metal circles shows no sign of slowing down, either.
One of the happiest moments for your standard metalhead, then, is when he or she finds a freshly delivered parcel in the mailbox, brought by none other than the legendary Mailmanbro. Mailmanbro’s myth grows weekly in the ToH Facebook group as he delivers more patches, CDs, stickers, and DVDs, always completing his transaction with a smile and a twinkle in his eye that reminds us that the void has not yet come. Mailmanbro is the hero Kevin Costner could only pretend to be, so it is with adoration that we are now dedicating a monthly post for you to show off all the wonderful treasures delivered to you by the kindly delivery savior.
I’ve bought very little physical media the last few months, so I can’t offer a picture of my own haul, but some of our elated readers were more than happy to contribute.
Mailmanbro helps Pagliacci build a battlejacket
Mailmanbro helps Fine Sexy Ladies requisition his groove
Mailmanbro helps Leif keep his nose to the grindstone
Mailmanbro enables Jack Bauer to go various shades of black
Mailmanbro helps Scrimm celebrate his namesake
Mailmanbro delivers the lizard clothing AND human skin
Mailmanbro keeps it orthodox with Coal Roll
Mailmanbro even punched in a very specific sequence of keys to traverse the realm of cyberspace to deliver joy to Dee Snarl
So, now’s your chance. Show us your hauls in the comments so we can be filled with covetous lust for the Mailmanbro’s package.
