Flush It Friday: Getting Elderly


Another menacing week has come to its rightful conclusion, and this Toilet Ov Hell scribe will be ending it in spectacular fashion. No, not by suicide, but by celebrating a birthday. You’re invited to share in the festivities in this post and you can also spew whatever is ailing you on this fine Friday as well.

As the title of this post indicates, I’m getting to an age that some might perceive as old. Others may perhaps try to spin it by saying my milestone age is the new twenty-five. Well, I’m not subscribing to either of those ideologies as I approach the ripe old age of forty. All I will say about that is I don’t look forty, I don’t feel forty (however that’s supposed to feel) and I definitely don’t act forty. I plan on continuing to be the same idiot jerkoff that I’ve been for the past thirty-nine years. This past year has been particularly exciting for me because I threw my hat in the ring and decided that I’d like to write for this site. I never would’ve imagined that I would continue further after doing a Bump N’ Grind post back in March of 2015, but the need for a creative outlet in life drove me to keep going. For me, this is like dishing about music with my physical friends, and it’s something I greatly enjoy. I’d like to take this opportunity to thank Joe, W. and Masterlord for bringing me aboard. I’m honored to be doing this with such a talented group of people whom I feel really put their heart and soul into everything we do here. Now that we’ve got all that out of the way, let’s commence with the flushing, shall we? Here goes:

Good: This whole milestone birthday thing comes with some nice celebratory perks. I have no idea what’s in store for this weekend other than spending time with family and friends. You can automatically assume that drinks will be involved and I will have a designated driver where ever I happen to wind up. As a bonus, it’s a three day weekend with President’s Day on Monday. Next weekend is what I’m looking forward to most. On Friday, I’m planning on going to catch Magrudergrind in Brooklyn. Their new album dropped today, and you can improve your life by going here to experience one of 2016’s best albums so far. The fun continues on Saturday as I’ll be headed to the stomping grounds of Frank Sinatra (Hoboken, NJ) for an evening with Candiria, Old Wounds, and Moontooth. A bunch of friends are going including some people I haven’t seen in a few years, so I’m looking forward to this one. Finally, as a birthday gift to myself, I plan on taking a trip later this year to an undecided destination. I’ll be keeping my eye on any music fests that may pop up and possibly make that the trip. Denver is also a strong possibility if nothing else looks good because they have a good music scene, good beer, good food and things that Jimmy McNulty likes to partake in.

Bad: For sanity’s sake, I really need to find a new job sooner rather than later. Without getting into it too much, my supervisor is a robot micro manager that is beyond annoying to have to deal with on a day to day basis. Any day I do not have to interact with this person is a good day. Constantly being asked what I’m working on every day is a counter productive nuisance in my eyes. I have to calm myself and refrain from answering every question like this a few days a week:


Even though I haven’t been looking as much as I should, there’s no shortage of opportunities. Almost every week, I am contacted by someone about a position they are trying to fill. The problem with this is that they are all located across the way in New York City, and I’m not currently willing to make that commute from New Jersey. Work sucks enough out of your soul during the week, and the added amount of time going to and from the workplace is not something I want to sacrifice at the moment. I’m not ruling it out entirely, but for right now I’m trying to have my next job be within state lines.

Also Bad: Valentine’s Day falls on my birthday so there’s a conflict of interest here. My only gripe is that I had to throw down $60 on flowers that will be dead in a week for the lady. Thanks for that Corporate Cupid because just about anyone who doesn’t do the flowers thing for their significant other on Valentine’s Day gets the Ultimate Douchebag Award.

Ugly: This Marty McFly Pharmo Bro Shkreli is quite the handsome fella right now. When the judge in his case drops the gavel on his punk ass, I hope he goes into general population for his crimes because his arrogance and his ignorance are going to be his undoing. No sipping banana daiquiris on a lounge chair at Club Fed for a guy who currently wins the award for most punchable face. He’s taken Justin Bieber’s spot in that category and that’s no easy task.


Terrible person resembles terrible character from terrible movie

That’s it for me, I now turn the floor over to the commenting crew. Share with us that which has lifted your spirits, that which is not good and that which you find disgusting or awful. The person who does this the best will receive the most up-votes. Get to it.

Images (VIA), (VIA), (VIA)

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