Flush it Friday: No Maximum Hand Size

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How farest thou, fellow farter?

Have you ever wondered where I got my name from? Probably not—you have much better things to thnk about in your spare time—but I’m going to tell you anyway!

Near the end of 2016, after years of curiosity (and learning that the girl I liked at the time was an avid player), I finally decided to give Magic: the Gathering a try. Roughly a year after getting into it, I discovered Commander. After a little bit of experimentation, I realized that I’m most drawn to combo decks and decks that are on the more aggressive end. There’s just something about always being the archenemy of the table, but still keeping them all at bay that I just can’t get enough of. Eventually, my collection of decks settled into three: Brago, Edric, and Krenko. And what did they have in common?

They all ran a copy of Reliquary Tower.

For my Krenko deck, it was mostly just a pet card, but in Edric and Brago—dramatic though it may sound—the card became a symbol of relief to me. Both of these decks were designed around drawing an absurd number of cards and without Reliquary Tower, my options for holding onto those cards were pretty limited. It was THE card that I fished for and practically a snap keep any time it was in my opening hand.

When I applied to write for this esteemed online outhouse, I wanted something that would go well with the fantasy themes found in a lot of metal, as well as something that would complement the (let’s face it) level of nerdiness it requires to spend one’s time giving your opinions on metal to strangers on the internet. And of course I wanted something with some personal meaning. With it being my favorite card and metal being some of my favorite music, it’s a crossover that just seemed to make sense.

Speaking of opinions given on the internet, it’s take a look at some of those! It’s flush time.


Joe and 365 return to your regularly scheduled programming (talking smack about bands) on this week’s episode of Toilet Radio:

Toilet Radio 501 – Luca Turilli’s Mushroomhead


Iron Goddess of Mercy put out an incredible write-up of the new Alcest album. Seriously, you won’t want to miss this one (the review or the album):

“We have each one life”: Alcest’s Les chants de l’aurore


Eenzaamheid poops out a premiere for Hubris Cannon. This one’s still steaming, so make sure you get in there:

Album Premiere: Hubris Cannon – Revised


And that’s all, folks! Thanks for stinking around for another week in this lovely latrine. We’re always happy to have you. So tell us what you’re happy about! Specifically with some G/B/U/s!

G: I’ve started going back to the gym after making excuses for far too long. It used to be that I couldn’t stand listening to music while I worked out. It was just too much intensity. But now, things seem to be different and it’s been giving me a good window of opportunity to get a daily dose of Manilla Road.

B: My legs hurt.

U: Certainly not the new Alcest, that’s for bloody sure!

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