Banging heads with a man in Brussells. 

That’s right, this week we’re jamming riffs from the land of plenty. Listen, vote, then make your own stupid jokes about Men At Work and other Australian clichés in the comments.

But no Steve Irwin jokes. That man was a saint, damn you.

Last week, the mighty, shining Spear took it home with GODS AND THE GOLD STANDARD METALLICA, authoritatively flushing all of our picks down the biggest, most putrid toilet ov hell. Well done and all hail Lars.



  • We’re doing riffs from a specific year again. I wanted to make it a challenge for you all by forcing you to pick something from the dark ages of shitty metal. W. suggested 2002. His will be done.
  • Send your 2002 riffs to toiletovhell@gmail.com. Include your name, a Youtube link, the time of the riff, and a description. First 15 are in.
  • If you have an idea for a theme, let me know in the comments.
  • Flush your life away.



Originally I had a killer Deströyer 666 riff in mind, but apparently so did everyone else. So, in an effort to diversify the selection, I picked this thing. I don’t know anything about Troldhaugen other than the fact this riff is really stupid and awesome and party.


Nordling Rites ov Karhu

Destroyah! 666! Mehr Satan! 1:20!



Surprising nobody, I’m picking Stargazer’s “…Of the Sun” (0:00). I could have picked any riff from any Stargazer song, as I’m disturbingly in love with the band. Alas, I’ll settle with the first riff from the first song from their first LP. Reason?  It was my introduction to the band, and they started out by throwing a brick at my face. It changed my life. I’ve listened to this song over 200 times whilst farming souls in Demon’s Souls.  Not even tired of it.



This riff is not satisfied with immediately crushing you. It slams you into the earth with a Buddha’s Palm then shifts key down to continue the onslaught before uppercutting you back to the tonic and the end of the song. 4:09.


Mr. Custodial Arts

The whole damn song. A bouncy, life loving riff… and an empowering message to boot! Crank this in your Pinto, and YOU CAN’T BE BEATEN. Sure, I coulda picked Blood Duster or some shit, but, whatever. BONUS POINTS – the unbridled, enthusiastic pantomiming in the video! SUPER BONUS POINTS – looks like they’re on the set of STREET TRASH.


Maik Beninton

The intro riff. It’s really good at letting you know that this song is awesome.


Cybernetic Organism

Black metal + industrial = BFFs. Cold, precise, melancholy and appropriately epic. Skip to 0:30 for Australian headbanging perfection. (NOTE: headbanging not limited to Australians).


Howard Dean

Riffs? From Australia? For me, there is only one answer:  Deströyer 666. Possibly the best metal band from this former English prison colony,  Deströyer 666 are relentless riff machines. KK Warslut is a thrashing master of the blackened arts. The hardest part was choosing only one. Riff starts at 1:32.



It’s pretty, has slight elements of heaviness and leads perfectly  into the climatic end of this great record. Time of riff – 3:05.



I have decided to go with the intro Truth Corroded’s track “Decimate” from their Upon The Warlords Crawl record. As an Australian myself, I hope it gets your heads banging.



I tried to resist the urge to submit Psycroptic, but I can’t do it – this week especially. The 2003 album The Scepter Of The Ancients is a must have for anyone into death, thrash, tech, guitars or drums. It showcases a multitude of styles without ever sounding like a clinic. This made it incredibly difficult to choose a single riff but I decided on one that is toward the back end of the album. I honestly couldn’t even choose a single riff from the song I picked, so maybe the furious uprising of guitars from HERE onwards. Victory doesn’t bother me too much, I just want you to give this album a listen.


Ted Nü-Djent

So hard to pick one riff from my homeland but in the end I had to go with my favourite Aussie band. 1:25 for the riff, but the real fun in this song is that you can change the words in the first line to “dingo stole my child” and it totally fits.



@2:36, bass and drums caress your ears before the guitar and vocals return and tear them off.



Riff begins at 0:20 and lasts till 1:00. What it lacks in catchy factor it more than makes up in swarm of fucking hornets about to banish you into the furthest regions of the abyss and void.


George Lynch

I am recently new to Portal. They are from Australia. Win. The riff starts at 0:46 and runs until 1:13. Try listening to the build up – it makes the release so much blacker, and trust me, there is none more black.

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