Flush It Friday: NERDS


Alright, my lads and lasses, let’s be totally honest with each other. We’re nerds.

First let’s take a look at the word itself. “Nerd” as a noun first showed up in Dr. Seuss’s 1950 children’s book If I Ran The Zoo as a disgruntled looking red and yellow creature with a black shirt and poofy white hair.


The term has come a long way since then and now more aptly describes what most people envision as a lanky, pimply, smart person with thick rimmed glasses and a pocket protector that whizzes away on their calculator for hours on end. Is this person a nerd? Probably. Is that where the definition ends? No.

According to dictionary.com “nerd” is defined as:

noun, Slang.


a person considered to be socially awkward, boring, unstylish, etc.


an intelligent but single-minded person obsessed with a nonsocial hobby or pursuit


Now, find a mirror, gaze deep into it and tell me what you see. Some of you may find definition number 1, some may not. That answer is irrelevant, though, and I want to focus on the second definition today. This simple statement describes every single person here on the Toilet. We obsess for hours trying to find the one band, with the one sound that we desire most, often times shunning those around us. We clickety-clack away on our keyboards sharing our findings with friends we’ve never met. Pretty nerdy if you ask me. “But Boss the Ross,” you may opine, “I’m not a nerd, I hang out with people and go to social events, etc.” And to that I say yes you do, but how often do you wish you were home spinning the new Post-blackened Power Metal Skronk album that the holy Mailmanbro delivered to you? Or how many of those social events are centered around your obsession? Metal shows? An assembly of nerds, if you ask me.

Alright, so now that we are all on the same page with that, I would like to inform everyone here that I will be going to a comic convention this weekend. Yes, I can already here the chants of “nerd, nerd, nerd” building in the comment section below. But remember what we talked about already: we’re all nerds. I just happen to be a nerd for comics as well.

My first convention was back in 2004 at the ripe old age of 12, and I had a blast. I met artists, actors and creators of some of my favorite characters, an opportunity that I had not thought possible at the time. Since then I have been to a dozen or so shows and met some really cool people, both known and unknown. One of my favorite aspects of these conventions is the ability to meet up and coming artists and writers; in fact that is really the only reason I continue to go nowadays. Within the past few years this sub-culture has blown out of proportion and become so over-saturated that just to meet a well-known actor it is going to cost you upwards of $40 for a simple autograph. You want a picture? A minimum of $75 in most cases. It basically sucks. So to off-put that, I usually shy away from that side of the floor and hang around the artists. Most comic workers are more than happy to plaster their John Hancock on anything and everything for little or no cost. A lot of them will do commission work as well, right on the spot. It really is a cool environment to experience and explore, and I highly recommend it to anyone interested.

Now on to business!

GOOD: Ken “TRUE METAL WARRIOR” Kelly is going to be there. Yes THE Ken Kelly, notable artist of such classics as Rainbow Rising, Love Gun and more importantly KINGS OF METAL!!!!!!!!!!!!! I am stupidly excited to meet the man, nay, the LEGEND behind some of the most triumphant album covers in the history of album covers. Just the thought of getting him to sign anything Manowar related is rather tantalizing. Oh, and a few other no-names such as William Shatner, Bruce Campbell, Danny Trejo and Sam Jones are going to be there. Yeah, no biggie.

BAD: I had to replace a tire on my wife’s car this week. I love NAILS, but not in tires, that blows. Other than that, no complaints from me!

UGLY: Costumes or “Cosplay” have been an integral part of conventions for years. They are a fun way to become one of your favorite characters or even create your own and show it off. HOWEVER, with every amazing costume comes a not so amazing one. Also, due to an unfortunate and unhealthy obsession many people have had this year with Joker and Harley Quinn, thanks to Hot Topic Squad, there are going to be wayyyyyyy too many of them this year. And most of them probably aren’t going to look good.


So the first part of today’s Flushing, as you may have guessed, was really just a red herring to throw you off from the fact that I am going to a con. I know I’m a nerd. I can handle that. But I just want to make sure everyone is on the same page about nerds and that they come in all different forms; it doesn’t matter what you obsess over.

Go ahead, bash away in the comments. In the meantime, though, let us know what your weekend plans are, what sucked about last week and what metal jams you will be jamming. See you around!

Did you dig this? Take a second to support Toilet ov Hell on Patreon!
Become a patron at Patreon!